Today was very busy for me. I started my new position and my dad also flew in today. So for my first day my supervisor assigned to me the very important task of.......drum roll please..............reading a compliance manual the size of a bell south all in one phone book. I smiled in his face real fake like "I'll definitely read it and take notes". Man as soon as I went to my desk I read one page and layed my lazy ass right inside the book then closed it on my head to block the lights. Twenty minutes later I woke up and read the first section. Feeling accomplished I felt the need to talk to my good buddy ol' pal Merce via text message. Isn't it strange how when you're at work you have the most pointless convos with people just to avoid work. Here's an example of the pointless exchange she and I had in the morning:
Merce: My feet hurt Damn it!!!!
Me: You better tighten them pussy walls up.
Merce: WTF that got to do with anything.
Me: I don't know I was caught up in the jet stream.
Merce: My feet ashy.
Me: Mine look like koala bear feet.
Merce: I Just screamed when I read that message. What is wrong with you?
Me: I'm 4 real it look like I climb trees and shit. But that's ok though because I'm gonna go home and break out my good knives and wear these feet of mine out!!
Merce: Man you sound like that one episode of Martin with Myra's feet.
Me: You got to go to work on Myra's feet!!!
After a big ignorant lunch (I had a burrito and she had some Church's):
Merce: Man I'm so sleepy....we don't do nothin we supposed to. Who do we think we are?
Me: Man we just Negros in america tryna make ends meet.
Merce: in a low ass tax bracket.
Me: But they keep trying to put us in a higher one...that's why I always opt out of all overtime and doing extra for incentives. Just give me my regular 8 to 5 Paycheck......shit all that other stuff don't do nothin but put us in a higher ass tax bracket anyway...shit. Man I'm bout to go to sleep again. call me when you get off.
So that was basically my first day and if everyday is like this then I'm gonna love this job!
Oh before I forget my dad and I went and got some chicken and beer, and watched the Olympics as our first bonding experience in years....It was cool but I feel so country now!!!!
One more thing!!!! I'm gettin ever so close to really finding out what exactly I do in this position so I'll keep ya'll posted.
*Song of the moment: Break The Ice- Britney Spears*